I started learning some introductory maths on my own recently--via a relatively rigourous proof oriented text, a format of which I had no background with--and on one of the first few pages the author says something along the lines of 'if you're learning this for the first time, you should be spending at least an hour per page'. I was shocked at first, a bit incredulous, an hour? per page? ridiculous -- until I started reached the actual text.
I thought I was bright as a child, not studying, but as I got older I realized this was not the case (albeit still holding out some hope). At first, in this endeavor, I was discouraged spending so long, but then, oddly enough, I found myself proud of the fact I spent so much time trying to understand the content. Reading and re-reading until I understood what was going on -- and then the next day, I would forget some of it, so I would read it again (this time spending less time (woohoo!)), until I could now not only recite the content but understand it.
There is one song that I encountered on youtube a decade or so ago, that I haven't been able to find since. It may have been deleted by the user, or something else altogether but I sometimes just think back and wish I had my penchant for archival back then. Doesn't help that the I recall the title being so vague that a search would yield like 300m results.
Do you have a standing desk? I find that standing in socks, barefoot, or even in indoor slippers is very fatiguing for my feet when standing for hours--so fatiguing in fact that I have a pair of indoor-only new balances, and only use them for standing at my desk inside my "home office". I wonder if there are any alternatives that are even healthier for my feet while avoiding foot/standing fatigue.
I'd like to be a writer, I like to write, I think my prose is decent. I think that's as close to being an artists as I could possibly be. I read a book once where someone became enlightened and could enlighten others through wood carvings, I think that would be really pleasant. I could also see myself teaching, I've seen what teaching can do, but I've also seen the current state of education, it would be tough, but aren't all things. There's also trades, maybe welding, or framing, architecture, something that incorporates art with manual labor--an "I did that" moment as you drive past something. Horticulture too, that's an option.
I thought I was bright as a child, not studying, but as I got older I realized this was not the case (albeit still holding out some hope). At first, in this endeavor, I was discouraged spending so long, but then, oddly enough, I found myself proud of the fact I spent so much time trying to understand the content. Reading and re-reading until I understood what was going on -- and then the next day, I would forget some of it, so I would read it again (this time spending less time (woohoo!)), until I could now not only recite the content but understand it.