OP here. I wrote this after realizing that modern dating apps suffer from the same 'explore-exploit' problems we see in high-entropy systems. I tried to apply Friston’s Free Energy Principle and Festinger’s proximity studies to explain why 'optimizing' for a partner usually leads to failure. Curious to hear what the HN crowd thinks about the 'immune system' metaphor regarding social friction
there is a really great app that i found super useful called roastguide (roastguide.app). i have tried many of them but this is by far the most complete one