I think you have to force yourself to commit to something. Sign up for a meetup and get that perfect attendance. Go a minimum, say 10 times, before giving it up. We're too interested in instant gratification but connections take time.
The easier but more expensive way is to hire a senior engineer. That might be hard to do at a small startup. The other way is to expand your network.
There is some luck involved but you can increase your chances by putting yourself in the places where a technical mentor would be. Attend meetups, hacker groups, conferences, talks.
Reach out to technical bloggers or other people in the sphere. If they can't help you directly, maybe they can redirect you to someone else.
I started writing about random experiences and thoughts at my blog: https://www.pixelsbetween.com but since I decided to self-host instead of going with a specific platform, it feels like I'm on my own tiny island.
I would love for a better way to share and find independent content like my own.
I think you have to force yourself to commit to something. Sign up for a meetup and get that perfect attendance. Go a minimum, say 10 times, before giving it up. We're too interested in instant gratification but connections take time.