Glad to see someone else with the same issue. I've never thought about "putting on" a bit of stress as a way to calm her down. I suppose it's because they feel like they're in the wrong for being the only one who is expressing stress/excitement?
They don't appear to be complementary either. The complement to #ee4035 is in the cyan range (~5cf7fa). You can get this by hand.
Convert #ee4035 to rgb(234, 64, 53). Subtract those values from max RGB domain (255) and take square root of difference of squares. i.e sqrt(255^2 - 238^2) etc.
You end up with rgb(92, 247, 250), or the cyan color mentioned above. You can also check this in several other complementary calculators.