It looks like you have discovered that life is boring. Doesn't matter in tech or any profession, we work to create wealth and get so engrossed in it. Once we conquer the "wealth" part we feel we don't have a meaning or a purpose anymore. And life is actually boring. To see life is boring and has no meaning is intelligence. I would go as far as to say only fools don't realize that life is boring and go on distracting themselves endlessly.
We have never lived with ourselves, we have continuously distracted ourselves with work and alcohol on weekends. When we see the futility of life, we start to get bored, and that boredom can manifest to anxiety and depression.
You need to learn to live with boredom. As much as you can. Some people call it meditation, some call if mindfulness but it doesn't matter what you call it. You need to learn to live with boredom because nature intended that way. Work is not absolute reality, games are not absolute reality, they were created by thoughts of people like you and me. What is real is the futility of life, and to embrace that you need to embrace the boredom, or the present.
If you are interested, I can tell/help you more, but my comment will get hidden somewhere down below. Still, reply to me, if you want some guidelines, because I smoked weed like you and drank and i am in IT too and now I have quit intoxication and learned to live with myself.
We have never lived with ourselves, we have continuously distracted ourselves with work and alcohol on weekends. When we see the futility of life, we start to get bored, and that boredom can manifest to anxiety and depression.
You need to learn to live with boredom. As much as you can. Some people call it meditation, some call if mindfulness but it doesn't matter what you call it. You need to learn to live with boredom because nature intended that way. Work is not absolute reality, games are not absolute reality, they were created by thoughts of people like you and me. What is real is the futility of life, and to embrace that you need to embrace the boredom, or the present.
If you are interested, I can tell/help you more, but my comment will get hidden somewhere down below. Still, reply to me, if you want some guidelines, because I smoked weed like you and drank and i am in IT too and now I have quit intoxication and learned to live with myself.