The Sony SRS-12 (or SRS-13) very small bluetooth speaker; $35ish.
Judging by this speaker being sold out in many big box stores before Xmas it seems a lot of people has a use for this.
In my case I have a small computer (asus pn51) that runs my dumb TV. When everyone else is in bed but I still want to watch basketball I turn this speaker on and perch it easily on my shoulder. I can hear it just fine but it's inaudible from 3 or more feet away. Everyone is happy. Marital bliss for $35 is a good deal.
But it's not. The Mint app is shutting down and I'm breathing easier.