What you want to do is encrypt/anonymize per user information using a translation layer that also gets backed up. In case of a gdpr request, you delete this mapping / key and voila: data cleanup. The backup data becomes unusable.
But this obviously means building an extensive system to ensure the encoded identifier is the only thing used across your system (or a giant key management system).
In the past I’ve been a part of systems at exabyte scale that had to implement this. Hard but not impossible. I can see how orgs try to ‘legalese’ their way out of doing this though because the only forcing function is judicial.
There is a point beyond which earning potential stops being a differentiator: you both have enough that it doesn’t matter. I agree there will be some hard conversations to get out of the preset habits though.
Till the point where the earning is necessary for your lifestyle - I can see how the first and second concept will play out: but that’s the trade off you’re taking for the benefits I mentioned.
I do agree all of this is based on the mutual agreement part. I was just pointing out it isn’t as dire as you say :)
There is a point where you hire help and this becomes moot.
Below that point, it comes to how you want to solve the finance problem as a couple IMO: if both your salaries are required, then obviously it means a full split.
Anecdotally - my wife chose to remain home and help raise our child / take care of the home and this turned out to be a force multiplier for me. I don’t think I would’ve made it to where I am, made whatever I made, built all my time sink hobbies without that decision.
It comes down to communication and being truthful to yourself Re: why do you want that job? If it is a passion, you should go for it irrespective of the earnings. If it is just an income, you’re just working for a random person instead of your own family. That’s a tough line to cross, but it worked for us with enough comms.
I think you may be over-defining what 'work' means.
The OP is a clear example of something that actually works, s/he even mentions some money being made.
If you set the bar for success at 'only an unicorn' - I can see how these can be considered failures. But that's a self-fulfilling prophecy by itself considering the tag unicorn :)
But this obviously means building an extensive system to ensure the encoded identifier is the only thing used across your system (or a giant key management system).
In the past I’ve been a part of systems at exabyte scale that had to implement this. Hard but not impossible. I can see how orgs try to ‘legalese’ their way out of doing this though because the only forcing function is judicial.