Ask HN: Advice for avoiding being a bad participant in meetings
8 comments
My experience of meetings and their players.
The Sheriff; my way or the highway.
The Bluffer; Yip, that’s been done.
The Hard Worker; Always segways to their latest piece of work.
The Brain; Says little, has manufactured outcome of meeting before the meeting started.
The Joker; Makes everyone laugh, is heard the least.
I’m personally trying to be a little bit less the joker and the hard worker.
The Sheriff; my way or the highway.
The Bluffer; Yip, that’s been done.
The Hard Worker; Always segways to their latest piece of work.
The Brain; Says little, has manufactured outcome of meeting before the meeting started.
The Joker; Makes everyone laugh, is heard the least.
I’m personally trying to be a little bit less the joker and the hard worker.
The Toll Collector; powerful, knows where things are, knows who to ping or where to look, but never offers help voluntarily--only offers it, barter style--for taking something off of their plate.
Also goes by "Brent"
Also goes by "Brent"
The Aggressor: criticises and deflates others; disagrees with others aggressively
The Blocker: stubbornly disagrees; rejects others' views; describes unrelated personal experiences
The Withdrawer: won't participate; talks to neighbour; self-appointed note taker; switches off
The Recognition Seeker: boasts; excessive talking; conscious of their status
The Topic Jumper: continually changes the subject
The Dominator: tries to take over; asserts authority; manipulates the group
The Special Interest Pleader: uses group's time to plead their own case
The Playboy: wastes group's time showing off; story-teller; nonchalant; cynical
The Self-Confessor: continually makes comments about own feelings and insights
We Only Come in Twos: a pair that turn up together and only talk to each other
The Bomb: discloses personal information distracting group from tasks
The Can't-be-Bothered: disinterested; messes about; test's the facilitator with disruptive behaviour
The Blocker: stubbornly disagrees; rejects others' views; describes unrelated personal experiences
The Withdrawer: won't participate; talks to neighbour; self-appointed note taker; switches off
The Recognition Seeker: boasts; excessive talking; conscious of their status
The Topic Jumper: continually changes the subject
The Dominator: tries to take over; asserts authority; manipulates the group
The Special Interest Pleader: uses group's time to plead their own case
The Playboy: wastes group's time showing off; story-teller; nonchalant; cynical
The Self-Confessor: continually makes comments about own feelings and insights
We Only Come in Twos: a pair that turn up together and only talk to each other
The Bomb: discloses personal information distracting group from tasks
The Can't-be-Bothered: disinterested; messes about; test's the facilitator with disruptive behaviour
The Senator; measures personal self worth using minutes of talk time.
The Inquisitor; dives into the minutiae of any topic.
The Inquisitor; dives into the minutiae of any topic.
The Grumpy Secretary; the person made to take notes who isn't senior enough to say no.
Planning meetings because $thing has to be discussed, but failing to organize the meeting, set an agenda or scheduling meetings without any planned outcomes and takeaways.
The latter half of this isn't always possible, but lately in my career I've made it a point to never call a meeting that doesn't bring up at least 2-3 things that will be/need to be acted upon or looked into by someone (even if I'm that person) based on what gets discussed.
The latter half of this isn't always possible, but lately in my career I've made it a point to never call a meeting that doesn't bring up at least 2-3 things that will be/need to be acted upon or looked into by someone (even if I'm that person) based on what gets discussed.
I try and ask myself these questions every time I attend a meeting:
- Why am I here?
- How could I avoid being here next time?
If you aren't providing value or the meeting is not providing value to you then you shouldn't be there. Perhaps the meeting shouldn't even exist? If this could have been a slack message or email or perhaps part of another existing meeting then you also shouldn't be there.
If you aren't providing value or the meeting is not providing value to you then you shouldn't be there. Perhaps the meeting shouldn't even exist? If this could have been a slack message or email or perhaps part of another existing meeting then you also shouldn't be there.
Not so much being a bad participant, but something I've found are developers who propose a solution to a problem outside of a meeting, but when it's then thrown out to the group for suggestions they remain quiet. Hard to know what advice to give for building confidence.
What mistakes did you make yourself in meetings that you have corrected as you progressed in your career?