What you said about the work required to keep buildings from degrading and the forest at bay is so true, but it's something you don't realize until you live it.
The other option I've been playing with is to treat homesteading like a hobby. Outsource all the non-core homestead work and insource the gardening, animal husbandry, etc (which is harder to outsource anyway), all while keeping a remote tech job.
How do you think about the risk of turning into one of those non-work people but also valuing long periods of not working?
When you initially quit, were you thinking you'd find a new position that you were passionate about and then it didn't materialize, forcing you to go back to your previous life?
I think it's just more likely that unacknowledged trauma originated in childhood. It's certainly possible to have unacknowledged trauma as adults, but it's less common because 1) it's closer in calendar time and therefore easier to remember and 2) you are more developed and able to actually identify what is traumatic.
If you are open to sharing, what did you do, if anything, to make it through the year of crisis? Did you stop meditating like the author, seek outside help, continue meditating or something else?
What's your perception of why the pandemic has caused a shift in pressure for you?
I ask because, like you, I feel much more stressed, but I can't really put my finger on why because my job has mostly stayed the same (besides going remote). Is it all just because of a reduction in in-person social contact? Or is it something else? In the beginning of the pandemic I got into a sort of manic mode of "do more faster" which was clearly not sustainable and caused me to almost burn out. The funny thing is there was nothing external pushing me to go faster, just my own brain and patterns. Are you experiencing something similar?
Definition of violence
1a: the use of physical force so as to injure, abuse, damage, or destroy
b: an instance of violent treatment or procedure
2: injury by or as if by distortion, infringement, or profanation : OUTRAGE
3a: intense, turbulent, or furious and often destructive action or force
the violence of the storm
b: vehement feeling or expression : FERVOR
also : an instance of such action or feeling
c: a clashing or jarring quality : DISCORDANCE
4: undue alteration (as of wording or sense in editing a text)
What is the food that's easiest to grow?