I agree. I don't think you can get past that stage without a few 'aha' moments that make you rethink things.
The mindset might be a bit of a trap because it can make you more isolated, which could then make those 'aha' moments less likely. In that position, you're right, waiting for it to fix itself won't be very effective so a more proactive approach sounds better.
These traits you describe, you say they are a side effect of good reasoning skills. I agree that people who think more methodically are more susceptible to these traits, however, I think they are actually characteristic of a certain immaturity in one's reasoning abilities.
To ask : "Why would anyone not do what's best if they know it is?", and to have no clue of an answer, would imply a lack of reasoning ability, rather than a surplus of it. Likewise for the other questions you suggest.
I think this way of thinking is very natural to a young mind who finds the world overly complicated and is attracted to the logical nature of subjects like maths. It is a sort of escape, to mentally write off everything that is not clean and simple as "illogical".
Clinging to that world view for long time would require serious cognitive dissonance though. It is a crutch that those with a 'problem solving' mindset hopefully use for a while before seeing things with a more subtlety.
I don't claim to know what reasoning maturity looks like, but I believe embracing your humanity and own fallibility, and understanding the motivations of others (especially those you dislike / disagree with) are not trivial elements of it.
I do feel like we are on a similar page though, since you are describing the traits of others, not your own, and you say you are happy to have developed your people skills. Still, I worry that explaining these traits away as the result of above average intellect is some sort of enabling. It's the narrative they need to stay in place so they don't have to change. IQ becomes a justification for being detached and uncaring.
I am not convinced by your example about converting parking to living spaces because it assumes it's not possible to achieve a one to one replacement. Building vertically like you suggest seems like the clear answer to this problem.
The mindset might be a bit of a trap because it can make you more isolated, which could then make those 'aha' moments less likely. In that position, you're right, waiting for it to fix itself won't be very effective so a more proactive approach sounds better.