Ask HN: Are we ready to take our lives back?
25 comments
Just go meet your parents. Don't live under that tension. I know 50 people who had Covid (yes someone out there will say their situation was bad - but the vast majority of those with Covid it was not bad) - but most said it was like the flu and they were tired for 2 weeks.
My advice would be quit testing yourself and get out there. I have been eating at restaurants all year with friends. we go 2x a week. None of us have been sick. That's a lot of exposure - if one thought that restaurants were a risk.
Go see your friends and live your life. Sure - wear a mask and wash your hands and be respectful of those who are fearful or at risk (like elderly) but go out. You will be fine.
It sounds like you are measuring the risk of not going out of your apartment. That's hard to quantify but certainly should not be minimized.
My advice would be quit testing yourself and get out there. I have been eating at restaurants all year with friends. we go 2x a week. None of us have been sick. That's a lot of exposure - if one thought that restaurants were a risk.
Go see your friends and live your life. Sure - wear a mask and wash your hands and be respectful of those who are fearful or at risk (like elderly) but go out. You will be fine.
It sounds like you are measuring the risk of not going out of your apartment. That's hard to quantify but certainly should not be minimized.
> I know 50 people who had Covid (yes someone out there will say their situation was bad - but the vast majority of those with Covid it was not bad) - but most said it was like the flu and they were tired for 2 weeks.
This is precisely the reason Covid is such a real menace: if it had more equal death rate impacts, I suspect we'd have seen far tighter restrictions to bring it under control, and far better adherence to public health advice.
Instead, Covid is one giant negative externality pushed to the margins.
This is precisely the reason Covid is such a real menace: if it had more equal death rate impacts, I suspect we'd have seen far tighter restrictions to bring it under control, and far better adherence to public health advice.
Instead, Covid is one giant negative externality pushed to the margins.
Where do you live that you've been able to eating at restaurants all year?
Here in NYC there's this laughable "outdoor dining"
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I've got to say, my mother was on the frontlines of COVID during the first lockdown.
It's so weird to think after risking her life, stressing over insufficient PPE, worrying that she'd make my father sick, scares over the slightest cough... that there's people like this, who are still in this bizarre world where "it's just a flu".
I mean to me this:
> yes someone out there will say their situation was bad - but the vast majority of those with Covid it was not bad
Do you comprehend what it's like when it does end up being bad? Have you seen what people dying from COVID actually look like? I still get stressed out just recalling a video that showed a patient with COVID in a hospital hallway taking these horrible rapid short breaths that didn't seem to be doing anything for them.
What you described is why COVID is so deadly to society as a whole. The people it "barely affects" get off with a flu (and often some lifetime complications but that's a special treat for later when we start seeing the long term effects of an inflamed heart) and the "few" it affects end up being massive drains on our healthcare system. Then the people who end up between those two extremes end up with a less prepared healthcare system and so on...
I found myself driving much more carefully post-COVID the times that I have because if I get in a serious accident something tells me the standard of care is not going to be near where it normally is....
Of course, the same people who talk tough like this and think "oh well if I get COVID just let me die! I probably won't die from it anyways!" are inevitably some of the same people who end up fighting for their lives in dark rooms alone regretting everything that lead them there...
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I've got to say, my mother was on the frontlines of COVID during the first lockdown.
It's so weird to think after risking her life, stressing over insufficient PPE, worrying that she'd make my father sick, scares over the slightest cough... that there's people like this, who are still in this bizarre world where "it's just a flu".
I mean to me this:
> yes someone out there will say their situation was bad - but the vast majority of those with Covid it was not bad
Do you comprehend what it's like when it does end up being bad? Have you seen what people dying from COVID actually look like? I still get stressed out just recalling a video that showed a patient with COVID in a hospital hallway taking these horrible rapid short breaths that didn't seem to be doing anything for them.
What you described is why COVID is so deadly to society as a whole. The people it "barely affects" get off with a flu (and often some lifetime complications but that's a special treat for later when we start seeing the long term effects of an inflamed heart) and the "few" it affects end up being massive drains on our healthcare system. Then the people who end up between those two extremes end up with a less prepared healthcare system and so on...
I found myself driving much more carefully post-COVID the times that I have because if I get in a serious accident something tells me the standard of care is not going to be near where it normally is....
Of course, the same people who talk tough like this and think "oh well if I get COVID just let me die! I probably won't die from it anyways!" are inevitably some of the same people who end up fighting for their lives in dark rooms alone regretting everything that lead them there...
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My mother is an anti-lock down, anti-vax, anti-covid-er, she's also in her 70s and she goes out of her way to snub the regulations. My sister (who is a doctor) is being vaccinated in secret because my mum is so staunch about it being "no big deal" and "If I die, I die!". Well sorry mum, but you'll die alone- I can't fly to see you.
Was going to ask this, where I am it's illegal to go outside unless for groceries or doctor.
I’m sorry this is difficult for you, and (for better or worse) you aren’t alone. I have a family (wife, mum, kids) and live in Florida, USA which hasn’t shut down much at all, and this has been difficult for us, I can’t imagine being in your situation. Well maybe I can, it would likely involve a lot more alcohol.
Without knowing your local restrictions, do everything you’re allowed to, safely. If you can create a COVID bubble, or just hang out outdoors in some manner with others, that would help me in your situation.
Have you considered moving to one of the tropical islands that’s advertising itself as a good place to hide out during this time? That might be a desperate move but if you’re desperate maybe it’s the right thing to do.
I don’t know your solution but I do know this is difficult, and it sucks.
Without knowing your local restrictions, do everything you’re allowed to, safely. If you can create a COVID bubble, or just hang out outdoors in some manner with others, that would help me in your situation.
Have you considered moving to one of the tropical islands that’s advertising itself as a good place to hide out during this time? That might be a desperate move but if you’re desperate maybe it’s the right thing to do.
I don’t know your solution but I do know this is difficult, and it sucks.
> Have you considered moving to one of the tropical islands that’s advertising itself as a good place to hide out during this time?
Link? I'd be interested depending on the costs (same situation as the OP).
Link? I'd be interested depending on the costs (same situation as the OP).
While I personally believe this is an incredibly self-centered perspective, I also don't deny you're more than welcome to be selfish and act upon that sense of self. The "I".
Curious however: how one intends to take one's life back when most other people are staying home and, at least where I live, nothing is open....
Curious however: how one intends to take one's life back when most other people are staying home and, at least where I live, nothing is open....
I have talked to dozens of people from my circle. Some had covid and some have not but all of them agree on one thing and that is that life should just go on.
If the healthcare system gets overwhelmed because "life just went on", so be it? My father developed cancer this year and it's been an absolute nightmare to deal with because the oncological nurses have been requisitioned to emergency care or the covid ward. Apparently we can't just 3D print more medical staff, who'd have thought?
I dont have an answer to your question. The healthcare system has never been designed for even epidemics let alone pandemics.
Nor has it been designed to account for rich countries stealing medical professionals. And yet people have to somehow with these caveats.
I have terrible eczema and I’d love to continue my treatment but this is not essential so I have to wait.
I know just one thing I cant wait any longer for a private corporation to solve this issue and the government is not willing to step up and help.
I have terrible eczema and I’d love to continue my treatment but this is not essential so I have to wait.
I know just one thing I cant wait any longer for a private corporation to solve this issue and the government is not willing to step up and help.
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I'm sorry to hear that, John.
I wish the best for your father.
I wish the best for your father.
It sounds to me like you should see a mental health services provider.
And I'm not saying that as a backhanded insult.
And I'm not saying that as a backhanded insult.
I cant see mental health service provider nor can I just visit a GP. They simply dont work anymore unless it is an emergency.
Why is a therapist or psychiatrist not available to you over video?
What I'm seeing right now is all my and my friends older parents have been vaccinated over the last two weeks. You should focus on making sure your parents get the vaccine as soon as they can.
Does the vaccine provide sterilizing immunity?
I believe this is not known. But is it relevant? Once the seniors are vaccinated, the death-rates from the virus should be so low that one could effective treat it as flu.
I think the question of whether the vaccine provides sterilizing immunity is relevant to evaluate policies like those being considered by United Airlines, whether to mandate vaccines for staff. The positive externality, or lack thereof, is important.
Vaccine appears to prevent you from getting seriously ill or dying of covid. For OP's parents that's the important thing.
My day consists of making a coffee, joining the morning stand up call at 7:30 and then grinding through the day until it’s 17:00. I leave the apartment to buy couple of beers not enough to get me wasted but enough to get me numb.
This repeats every single day. I cant get rest. At all. I am a prisoner in my apartment.Every little noise makes me realize that there is no way I can rest at home.
I have not met my parents for a year now. They say I should.That this pandemic is fake and they are not scared.
They do know this pandemic is real but dont care anymore. Staying at home all day and not meeting with anyone is not life worth living.
I had been tested for covid 20 times already. Some cheap AGs some expensive PCRs. I had to do it because the government said I had to. I never had any symptoms. Never met with anyone at all.For some tests I had to pay myself.I can still afford it. Still. But for how long?
I keep hearing how we just have to wait a little longer. How a bunch of private corporations will make this go away.
Unless maybe it wont go away because there is a new strain because we have waited too long to roll out the vaccines.
I am ready to take my life back. No matter what happens next I am not, nor my parents are,going to live like this.
Whatever it takes I am taking my life back.