Ask HN: Who Needs Help?
19 comments
I've been struggling with a lifelong self motivation problem
I'm a skilled guy, I can learn anything when I put my mind to it. I've always been a high performer at jobs
I cannot focus on personal side projects to save my life. I have always wanted to make videogames but any time I sit down and try my attention slides off. It's like this with most of my hobbies
I'm nearly 40 and starting to feel like I'll never be able to achieve my dream. It's very frustrating because I'm very capable otherwise. I've had a pretty successful career so far. I'm capable when I have external influence I suppose. But self motivation and self starting feels impossible
I've read everything about it but I thought I'd throw this out there in case you have some new insight I've never heard before
I'm a skilled guy, I can learn anything when I put my mind to it. I've always been a high performer at jobs
I cannot focus on personal side projects to save my life. I have always wanted to make videogames but any time I sit down and try my attention slides off. It's like this with most of my hobbies
I'm nearly 40 and starting to feel like I'll never be able to achieve my dream. It's very frustrating because I'm very capable otherwise. I've had a pretty successful career so far. I'm capable when I have external influence I suppose. But self motivation and self starting feels impossible
I've read everything about it but I thought I'd throw this out there in case you have some new insight I've never heard before
What do I need?
Right now I mainly need financial help (2,000 usd), to cover some important basic expenses in my life while I continue searching for work.
What's stopping me?
I'm a freelance web developer. I've been actively applying, reaching out, and trying to line up new work, but the gap has lasted longer than I expected and my savings ran out.
Why aren't I thriving?
Mostly timing and the unpredictability of freelance work.
I'm accepting USDC (BEP20) at:
0x9357fc346afe270faab8f873400a39cc9cdc6b3b
Thank you for the kindness.
Edit: Help would be very much appreciated. I'm in a very bad place at the moment.
Right now I mainly need financial help (2,000 usd), to cover some important basic expenses in my life while I continue searching for work.
What's stopping me?
I'm a freelance web developer. I've been actively applying, reaching out, and trying to line up new work, but the gap has lasted longer than I expected and my savings ran out.
Why aren't I thriving?
Mostly timing and the unpredictability of freelance work.
I'm accepting USDC (BEP20) at:
0x9357fc346afe270faab8f873400a39cc9cdc6b3b
Thank you for the kindness.
Edit: Help would be very much appreciated. I'm in a very bad place at the moment.
Thanks for sharing. It's terrifying to be so tight on finances.
What region are you based? Do you have a portfolio I can share? Feel free to email me at [email protected] if you don't want to share publicly
What region are you based? Do you have a portfolio I can share? Feel free to email me at [email protected] if you don't want to share publicly
I've emailed you from the email on my profile.
I need help finding gigs, this year has been one of a kind. I have jobs I did last year that the client is finding it difficult to even pay for what has been done.
I am a software engineer with 12 years of experience. I put in the work and am also running my own business, and it's also tight making ends meet there. I just want part-time or full-time freelance remote work. I always deliver on my work.
Thanks in advance...
I am a software engineer with 12 years of experience. I put in the work and am also running my own business, and it's also tight making ends meet there. I just want part-time or full-time freelance remote work. I always deliver on my work.
Thanks in advance...
What I probably need most right now is honest feedback. I’ve been building something and I’m trying to understand if the idea actually makes sense outside my own head.
Need help establishing if identity preservation is technically possible for LLMs, or if only information transfer so far.
I'd love to help, but I need more info please :)
Loneliness. Inability to break out of it. Feel the need of a partner, a woman to share life with (also feel the need for intimacy a lot), but simply can't find anyone. Can't even find friendship. Or when I do find friendship, it's not balanced, or doesn't feel right so I just get away. Spend most of my time in some sort of isolation.
Lots of problems that generate stress, but are not in themselves on the path to fulfillment or thriving. But they absolutely block me and have no choice but to deal with them. Things that could be solved by throwing money at them maybe, but even tho I'm safe and stable financially, that spending can easily get out of control in a HCOL area where I live. All my life I've tried to do everything myself (everything from home building, renovations, car/bike repairs, carpentry, electronic repairs etc) and have a significant aversion towards spending money in general.
Worries. Lots of worrying about scenarios that 98% never happen, but still give me sleepless nights.
Generally, lack of energy to solve all the issues, or fix things. I burn most of my energy in my physical job, having abandoned my tech career many years ago.
But I know that eventually it will all work out. I also have an intimate knowledge of what the causes of these circumstances are and what the solutions are. (hint: has to do with thoughts, and generally stem from childhood).
LE. And one other issue I have. The 2h deletion window is elapsing and I don't know if I want all this stuff associated with my username. Is it shame? Does it feel like I'm complaining about something? I know I can frame my circumstances in such a way that I would be in a very fortunate position. I have no material worries, I live in a place full of harmony in the Western world, I did have some very beautiful life experiences in the past, including a love story that absolutely changed me and my perspective on life. And above all, I have belief.
PPS. I just got reminded of one of the biggest sources of stress in my life. The freaking neighbor downstairs who slams the f'in door, even tho I asked as nicely as I could tens of time not to do that. And since it's a 120 y.o. building, and probably a majority of my net worth in it (and I'm concerned about the structural integrity over a long time period ...), it's making me so angry ... But I'll get this sorted eventually.
Lots of problems that generate stress, but are not in themselves on the path to fulfillment or thriving. But they absolutely block me and have no choice but to deal with them. Things that could be solved by throwing money at them maybe, but even tho I'm safe and stable financially, that spending can easily get out of control in a HCOL area where I live. All my life I've tried to do everything myself (everything from home building, renovations, car/bike repairs, carpentry, electronic repairs etc) and have a significant aversion towards spending money in general.
Worries. Lots of worrying about scenarios that 98% never happen, but still give me sleepless nights.
Generally, lack of energy to solve all the issues, or fix things. I burn most of my energy in my physical job, having abandoned my tech career many years ago.
But I know that eventually it will all work out. I also have an intimate knowledge of what the causes of these circumstances are and what the solutions are. (hint: has to do with thoughts, and generally stem from childhood).
LE. And one other issue I have. The 2h deletion window is elapsing and I don't know if I want all this stuff associated with my username. Is it shame? Does it feel like I'm complaining about something? I know I can frame my circumstances in such a way that I would be in a very fortunate position. I have no material worries, I live in a place full of harmony in the Western world, I did have some very beautiful life experiences in the past, including a love story that absolutely changed me and my perspective on life. And above all, I have belief.
PPS. I just got reminded of one of the biggest sources of stress in my life. The freaking neighbor downstairs who slams the f'in door, even tho I asked as nicely as I could tens of time not to do that. And since it's a 120 y.o. building, and probably a majority of my net worth in it (and I'm concerned about the structural integrity over a long time period ...), it's making me so angry ... But I'll get this sorted eventually.
It sounds like you're navigating a really dark time, man.
Some things that have helped me reset in the past:
• the easiest way to make friends is to go volunteer somewhere. doing hard things with people is the only way i've found to deepen relationships. you will want to hang out with people you've picked up trash with, but maybe not folks you've played pickleball with
• block your phone from everything for 30 days: https://shiftyourphone.com
• spend 12 hours bicycling in one direction on Saturday, and then bicycle back home on Sunday
• no booze, no weed, no cigs
• it sounds like you also want companionship. the way to find a life partner comes naturally from the other things: making deep friendships via volunteering, resisting the algos, being healthy, etc.
• all of these probably require energy that you don't think you have. set a 5:00am alarm and your brain will eventually accept that your body wants to do the new thing
Some things that have helped me reset in the past:
• the easiest way to make friends is to go volunteer somewhere. doing hard things with people is the only way i've found to deepen relationships. you will want to hang out with people you've picked up trash with, but maybe not folks you've played pickleball with
• block your phone from everything for 30 days: https://shiftyourphone.com
• spend 12 hours bicycling in one direction on Saturday, and then bicycle back home on Sunday
• no booze, no weed, no cigs
• it sounds like you also want companionship. the way to find a life partner comes naturally from the other things: making deep friendships via volunteering, resisting the algos, being healthy, etc.
• all of these probably require energy that you don't think you have. set a 5:00am alarm and your brain will eventually accept that your body wants to do the new thing
Dude. This comment of yours made me quite angry. I feel insulted, sort of like Dostoyevsky would feel getting writing advice from an average run-of-the-mill, unsuccessful chicklit writer. Also made me realize that I'm in a much better spot than you, and wouldn't trade with your position for all the money in the world.
Because it sounds like you're just clueless, or have the emotional intelligence of a teenager, or just lacking life experience. All of the things you mentioned are useless, some are harmful, to the point that I wonder what exactly was in your mind when you made this thread.
Was there a genuine desire to help? Then I should probably mail you a bank account. I'd use the money for people in need, not for myself. But I think it's more likely that you just felt some sort of a need for validation, that seems to be the main driving force behind it.
Because it sounds like you're just clueless, or have the emotional intelligence of a teenager, or just lacking life experience. All of the things you mentioned are useless, some are harmful, to the point that I wonder what exactly was in your mind when you made this thread.
Was there a genuine desire to help? Then I should probably mail you a bank account. I'd use the money for people in need, not for myself. But I think it's more likely that you just felt some sort of a need for validation, that seems to be the main driving force behind it.
Yeah, I'm admittedly pretty clueless! I'm trying to learn
Very sorry I rubbed you the wrong way. I wanted to share some things that have helped me, but it may have come off as prescriptive/condescending. Sorry about that
Very sorry I rubbed you the wrong way. I wanted to share some things that have helped me, but it may have come off as prescriptive/condescending. Sorry about that
I'll help as much as I can too, by upvoting :)
hello! im stardesk staff and i noticed you said >Error 403 >Your client does not have permission to get URL /api/v1/release/dl/1 from this server. Could you please share the exact browser type you used? Thanks so much!
Need a tech co-founder who is passionate about XR, and has experience with Godot and 3D graphics programming.
Email: [email protected]
Email: [email protected]
What's stopping you?
Why aren't you thriving?
I don't have much to offer, but I'll try to help however I can :)