Do not buy into the whole victimization of you based on your age. Resist this temptation.
The truth is that some "old" people are actually "weird" as are some really young people may be "annoying".
Of course the typical 60 year old will not fit in with a bunch of mid-20's people working on the next Godforsaken social sharing app.
DO NOT FALL FOR VICTIMIZATION TALK.
Everyone has a choice of how they save, invest, learn and who they associate with.
Do not like many companies and how they operate? Good, me neither.
Do not like drab catered lunches amd having to eat with assholes and listen to their vapid conversation? Good, I hate it too.
Don't want to work with know-it-all 20's kids (one that you probably were too at that age). Good, I don't either.
Therefore I don't.
I'm an independent software developer and stashing away as much of my money into Rental properties, Bitcoin, dividend producing investments and boring but safe bonds.
If you are worried about losing your job for ANY REASON, then it is your fault amd responsibility to fix your own emotion state:
- why did you take on a bigger mortgage than necessary?
- why did you spend 10's of thousands of dollars on a fancy car (or borrow the money for it)
- why did you not invest your money to work for you.
Instead of you working for money (by 40 you should be able to pull in minimum wage for sleeping and doing nothing).
But most people screwed their 20's and then maybe realized late 30's that there's a thing call Passive Income (as defines by tax code) and Investment Income.
We have a generation of men and women who made terrible life choices and now are shocked that they feel the need to continue working with young people.
Now the victimization brigade is coming to tell you that "It's not your fault you are being discriminated for your age".
Fuck yes it is. Why the hell are you working with assholes?
No one is preventing you from starting your own business, doing amazing work as an independent consultant or pursuing additional lines of income.
What did you think was going to happen when you got older? That's right, you will be treated as you treated older worker when you were young.
Heck, I just called my father "old man" for his birthday last night. Is that discrimination?
Yes.
Is it UNFAIR discrimination?
NO. He did live a longer life and is factually older. Who knows, I may not experience as many years as him. It is FAIR discrimination in a lot of cases.
Only unjust and unfair discrimination is what we should concern ourselves with. The article makes no attempt to articulate beyond a bunch of numbers cuz "discrimination"
Boys behave differently around girls and will form weaker bonds with each other.
Boys grow up to be providers and need to be pushed hard because life is hard on them.
Men's income forms the largest tax base. The average man provides a net positive return on tax base whereas women a net negative in North America.
Men are disproportionately representing in:
- Wars, army (98%)
- Suicides
- Occupational death and injury
- On average tend to work longer hours
- Die many years younger lofe expectancy
- Hard, but important jobs like coal mining, drilling, construction, etc)
There are almost as many rapes of boys and men as there are girls and women each year.
I dare you to dig through and find the stata yourself and when you understand why these stats are buried, you will start to see what we have been tricked into.
Another example of women and girls limiting the opportunities for men to build strong positive masculine identities.
With the "women's only fitness" to other women's only clubs.... we are turning this into a twisted future where womem are the only ones allowed to have groups that are gender discriminatory.
I'm going to say something that may not go well with others here and may be repulsive at first. Hear me out though.
There are 2 issues here and they are separate.
Issue #1. Is it worth relocating to SV for your "dream job"?
A few things to note are:
- There are no "dream" jobs. That's a myth. You are building someone elses vision and domesticating yourself further.
- What will your net worth become after 1, 2, and 3 years after this job relative to current opportunities of where you are at now. Will you actually get ahead and achieve your Real dreams and life purpose, or merely toil away in a land far from loved ones and spend precious years somewhere you do not want to be.
- Why do you have to move? That says something about how needy the employer is. They probably have games, "free" food, and noisy open offices.
Issue #2. Fear of the loss of love(r)
- Are you genuinely happy and secure in your relationship? If you were going to propose. You would have done so already and not weigh different options. Men are decisive and when they are not, it is because their intuition ia telling them something.
- If she would not move with you. Would you move if she "got her dream job offer". How would that play out a) she took it or b) she didn't take it and "stayed" with you. Reflecting on this question will reveal something to you about the quality of your relationship, as well as the power dynamic and is useful analysis.
- Do her goals and yours line up? Moving in together is Common Law marriage. Look up the stats on how many women get pregnant in such situations after X months. Apply an estimate for when you will have your first child (if she wants kids and you both can biologically have them). Decide if you really want this and are ok with the probability.
- Are any underhanded tactics such as "if you loved me, you would stay" being used or mentioned? If anything resembles this uncomfortable line of questioning, then it's time to take a hard look at whether it is the right thing to continue being together.
Hope this gives something to think about and meaningful insights as a result.
There are 6 big fears that a person can have. And I suspect a couple are at play and hindering decisive action.
Also, I'm going to be hard on you with the passive language:
"I recently received a compelling offer..."
So you mean that an offer landed on your lap from the heavens, with no volition or involvement from yourself?
Or did you mean that you DELIBERATELY sought out a killer opportunity and nailed it?
If it fell from the heavens, then it wouldn't be a discussion point. I am suspecting it is the latter. Your behaviour and choices are telling you something. Do not second guess yourself and do not let the fear of the loss of love get in the way of your happiness. She is your girlfriend. Not your wife. Not the mother of your children. Not your sister. Not your mother.
Once I started foraging and hunting for my pay...I started to feel more free and much less likely to take bullshit from anyone (afterall, there is always the next hunt).
The core of your being is changed when you start with yourself as your mental point of origin and take nothing for granted when it comes to the "mythical job security".
It's doubly so liberating when you do not have to deal with the ghosts of past employers and the shadow of what "future employers" will think.
How do you, as a doctor, reconcile that there is no test/falsifiable criteria for depression?
You may be able to identify "major depression" but how many times is it just a case of "lack of meaningful purpose" and just "bad decisions" that are compensated for with drugs that may do more harm than good?
Has anyone else noticed the odd "coincidence" that depression is associated with -depressive- states such as
- sitting around and not exercising
- keeping to oneself and not socializing and helping others
- repeating negative talk outloud
- aimlessness and laziness to formulating a meaningful life purpose
Could it be that this "depression" is really a diagnosis of:
- sitting around and not doing something for others and the world?
We act like there's an abstract or canonical "depression"... but really it is our interpretation of a person's outward expression, action, and contribution.
As a software contract worker, the last thing I want is "upward mobility".
That means more bullshit and less actualy hands on development.
Being a contract worker let's you control your taxes better and you can find another gig without feeling like you killed the family cat when you 'leave for another opportunity'.
If your thing is upward mobility, then incorporate yourself. Slap on CEO and Director title on your LinkedIn profile and call it a day.
"...That’s why I asked my husband to do it as a gift."
What kind of "gift" is "asked" for and when not received it is aired in public and shame the man for not living up to the expectations she "didn't feel the need to communicate".
This is frankly disgusting and speaks volumes about the author's solipsism and inconsideration of her husbands story. One sided and exceptionally ignorant. Under the guise of "Equality".
I am a man and enjoy this "emotional labor" managing my house and investment properties. I also make a great income as a software consultant and enjoy calling suppliers and service professionals and is pretty easy. Pick up the phone, talk to people, schedule appointments.
This speaks more to her choice of mate and her communication abilities and the kind of contempt she has for her husband. For the whole world to see. He would be wise to re-evaluate her commitment and his commitment to the relationship.
This a kind of emotional blackmail and will serve to control him in the future since he knows that she will air their dirty laundry to be on the internet forever.
A lifetime of financial security and building great businesses?
Or working for someone else / struggling to make ends meet because you thought you could turn 12M into 50M or 200M. But in fact it flopped.
If you have more than enough to be financially secure already (and perhaps your children if you choose that path).... then go for the home run.
But if this thing comes crashing down (99% of businesses fail within 5 years and 99% of the remaining 1% fail in the next 5)... then what would you think?
Sure would be nice to put a million or two in the pocket today.
I'm going to get flak for this.... but there's probably a better chance that BTC/ETH will return 10x returns over the next 10 years than turning a business valued at 12M into 120M.
Yes, that is speculation. But so is your ability to scale 10x (but at least somewhat within your control).
Do not buy into the whole victimization of you based on your age. Resist this temptation.
The truth is that some "old" people are actually "weird" as are some really young people may be "annoying".
Of course the typical 60 year old will not fit in with a bunch of mid-20's people working on the next Godforsaken social sharing app.
DO NOT FALL FOR VICTIMIZATION TALK.
Everyone has a choice of how they save, invest, learn and who they associate with.
Do not like many companies and how they operate? Good, me neither.
Do not like drab catered lunches amd having to eat with assholes and listen to their vapid conversation? Good, I hate it too.
Don't want to work with know-it-all 20's kids (one that you probably were too at that age). Good, I don't either.
Therefore I don't.
I'm an independent software developer and stashing away as much of my money into Rental properties, Bitcoin, dividend producing investments and boring but safe bonds.
If you are worried about losing your job for ANY REASON, then it is your fault amd responsibility to fix your own emotion state:
- why did you take on a bigger mortgage than necessary?
- why did you spend 10's of thousands of dollars on a fancy car (or borrow the money for it)
- why did you not invest your money to work for you.
Instead of you working for money (by 40 you should be able to pull in minimum wage for sleeping and doing nothing).
But most people screwed their 20's and then maybe realized late 30's that there's a thing call Passive Income (as defines by tax code) and Investment Income.
We have a generation of men and women who made terrible life choices and now are shocked that they feel the need to continue working with young people.
Now the victimization brigade is coming to tell you that "It's not your fault you are being discriminated for your age".
Fuck yes it is. Why the hell are you working with assholes?
No one is preventing you from starting your own business, doing amazing work as an independent consultant or pursuing additional lines of income.
What did you think was going to happen when you got older? That's right, you will be treated as you treated older worker when you were young.
Heck, I just called my father "old man" for his birthday last night. Is that discrimination?
Yes.
Is it UNFAIR discrimination?
NO. He did live a longer life and is factually older. Who knows, I may not experience as many years as him. It is FAIR discrimination in a lot of cases.
Only unjust and unfair discrimination is what we should concern ourselves with. The article makes no attempt to articulate beyond a bunch of numbers cuz "discrimination"
You are not a victim.