I think labelling a development methodology and macho or not engineering is disingenuous. Any methodology practiced without an engineering mindset looks like that. Agile methodologies practiced by engineers looks like good engineering.
I had OCD (compulsive hand washing, obsessive food hygiene beyond normal, obsessive about which things touched my lips or hands)
It was tiring. Frustrating. Depressing. It felt like a disease that ruled my life.
A change in circumstances distanced me from unrelated stresses in my life and the OCD disappeared. It seemed that it was a manifestation of unrelated stresses.