Start by going to a bar and just being there. Become sort of a regular. It's very easy to do and you don't need to do anything demanding or anything you don't want to do. Just sit there and be around people. You don't need to talk if you don't want to. Natural conversations and connections just happen. Don't force it. Be patient. If you are there long enough you will become a regular and meet other people in your neighborhood. From there you can branch out into other activities; just the act of being around people will open up doors that you didn't think were there.
Don't do anything on your work computer that is not work related. I include reading tech news and visiting Hacker News in the group of work-related tasks because it is something that I can do and get away with at work. But I never use my work laptop to do anything I would not do in the office in front of other co-workers.
If you are working remotely you should bring your personal laptop with you or at least an iPad so that you can browse the internet as you would do in the privacy of your own home.
Don't try to prove yourself or worth by "over programming". Learn the culture and abide by it. Don't try to change everything as soon as you start working. Control your ego.
Why do you get stressed out from programming? Where are your team members? They should be there to give you support. And maybe you are trying to hard. You don't have to program at breakneck speed every day. I have a feeling you are being too hard on yourself and you are trying to write perfect code. Don't do that. Don't have an ego. Work with your team. Allow yourself to learn and get better, and learn how to take criticism. You are one of the luckiest people in the world to have the occupation that you have. Everyone else has so much more of a tedious, stressful and tiring work life. Appreciate your gifts and what you have.
That is a very inspiring perspective on how work aids in dealing with life. I hope you do find work that provides challenging and meaningful problems for you to solve. You deserve it.
You shouldn't have to work on interesting problems at work because Life is the most interesting problem. You should have as much time and mental resources as possible to handle that problem/puzzle.
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