If you are really trying to understand the psyche, you would be more open, ask more questions, and be less judgy. Telling people to go hug a tree is not how you understand people, and it does make you look bad.
I'm in the same boat as you, tho. I'm in the video game streaming industry... I don't understand at all how people actually watch other people play video games, and I do think there's benefit to disconnect.
If you had shit on your arm you'd just scrub it without water?
Filipino uses a system called tabo, or sometimes a hand hose bidet (I call it the bum gun). If the pressure of bum gun is strong enough, well, it's like a pressure gun. You shoot it at 45 degrees angle (cause 90 hurts lol).
If the pressure is not strong enough, then use it like tabo. Tabo is a water scoop. You water your hand, you water your butt, then you soap both of them, and wash it out. It's a shower but just for your butt.
This sounds a little bit weird and disgusting but it is the cleanest since it's like a shower. Nothing beats a soap and scrub.
If there's tissues, take a tissue, pat down your butt so it's dry, put it in the bin.
1) We moved from Gitlab to Phabricator and Phabricator CI sucks so much, we integrated buildkite with it instead
2) We quickly realised that Buildkite UI is superior, but also its runners. You can add custom extensions to Buildkite and make it do whatever you want https://buildkite.com/plugins