Ask HN: Being Highly Sensitive (HSP), can I find fulfilling work in tech?
10 comments
I'm not terribly familiar with the language and framework around HSP, but I can identify with many of the traits listed here: rattled by pressure, accurate but quite slow, having to steel myself very deliberately to get through PR reviews, etc. I've been doing a lot of work with the Enneagram (highly recommend it, it's about understanding the trap and coping mechanism that is your personality and transcending it to get to your true self) and I definitely come down as a 4.
You can succeed in tech. Tech is so, so vast. There are so many areas and facets to it that have nothing to do with FAANG or the Big 5 or whatever.
What's worked for me, and what may work for you, is to stay away from "sexy" tech. I'm at a relatively unsexy tech company in an office on the east coast, and I've found a group that's working on cool stuff without the pressure and ego of stereotypical SV ("move fast and break things"). The environment and culture is rigorous but much more relaxed, and my team places a lot more value in correctness and runtime speed over development speed.
Not everyplace in tech is pressure cooker. Not every person is ego driven. Even though I'm in a relaxed environment, I still struggle with comparing myself to my colleagues and dealing with feelings of inadequacy, but because I can recognize that tendency in myself I can do things to address it. Many of those things end up being spending my time away from work _truly_ away from work and finding my identity outside of my job. That might be antithetical to running startups, or it may not.
My emotional intelligence is ultimately a benefit to my team if I can keep it in check, just as the drive to get things done from one of my colleagues is a benefit if kept in check, and the cautious nature of another if kept in check, and the devil-may-care optimism of another if kept in check, etc.
We all need the strengths of each other, and your sensitivity, if kept in check, will be a benefit in the right environment.
You can succeed in tech. Tech is so, so vast. There are so many areas and facets to it that have nothing to do with FAANG or the Big 5 or whatever.
What's worked for me, and what may work for you, is to stay away from "sexy" tech. I'm at a relatively unsexy tech company in an office on the east coast, and I've found a group that's working on cool stuff without the pressure and ego of stereotypical SV ("move fast and break things"). The environment and culture is rigorous but much more relaxed, and my team places a lot more value in correctness and runtime speed over development speed.
Not everyplace in tech is pressure cooker. Not every person is ego driven. Even though I'm in a relaxed environment, I still struggle with comparing myself to my colleagues and dealing with feelings of inadequacy, but because I can recognize that tendency in myself I can do things to address it. Many of those things end up being spending my time away from work _truly_ away from work and finding my identity outside of my job. That might be antithetical to running startups, or it may not.
My emotional intelligence is ultimately a benefit to my team if I can keep it in check, just as the drive to get things done from one of my colleagues is a benefit if kept in check, and the cautious nature of another if kept in check, and the devil-may-care optimism of another if kept in check, etc.
We all need the strengths of each other, and your sensitivity, if kept in check, will be a benefit in the right environment.
I agree with this, there are a lot of businesses which do interesting things without the pressure and stress big 5 bring.
Thank you for your extensive comment! Lots of food for thought, and much appreciated. I have tried Enneagram before (being a 4 as well, IIRC), but I may need to look into it again in more detail.
> I'm accurate but also kinda slow
Quality or speed you cant have both, there is lots of work in the tech world for people that can produce quality. You also talk about wanting to be organised, lots of work for organised people in the tech world. All of your personality traits that make you feel overwhelmed are probably your greatest assets if you can find work that makes use of them.
You have tried a lot of different types of work in the tech sector but there are more still, lots more. Try smaller businesses and other less corporate overlord tech companies.
In my experience there is more shitty work than there is good work, keep trying shit until you find something that works for you.
Quality or speed you cant have both, there is lots of work in the tech world for people that can produce quality. You also talk about wanting to be organised, lots of work for organised people in the tech world. All of your personality traits that make you feel overwhelmed are probably your greatest assets if you can find work that makes use of them.
You have tried a lot of different types of work in the tech sector but there are more still, lots more. Try smaller businesses and other less corporate overlord tech companies.
In my experience there is more shitty work than there is good work, keep trying shit until you find something that works for you.
Thank you for instilling some optimism. Of course you're right, one has to keep looking.
You haven't yet tried a university system which may be a good fit for you. They typically operate at a slower pace, are much more detail oriented, and accommodate a wide range of employees.
Thanks for the suggestion! That would be something in the context of either education or administration, right? Ironically, I always had the idea that people end up in the university system if they're »not good enough to work in the real world«.
You'll probably want to look for research engineering related positions, a lot of universities have associated research laboratories that do R&D work for various organizations. Regarding the quality of people, I have one friend who just went from a university position to Google and another that went to Apple.
»Do you get rattled when you have a lot to do in a short amount of time? (...) Do you make it a high priority to arrange your life to avoid upsetting or overwhelming situations? (...) If you notice everything, you are naturally going to be overstimulated when things are too intense, complex, chaotic, or novel for a long time.« [1]
After my studies I have worked for 2 years in one of The Big Five. I take this as a proof that I have sufficient intellect for the field, but the time has also pretty much burned me out and badly damaged my professional confidence. Because I'm accurate but also kinda slow, sorting through the load of corporate e-mail alone I found overwhelming. Add a demanding environment, with time pressure, peer reviews and the like, and you have enough to brake me. Later, I co-founded a start-up and participated in another, both as a tech lead, and I enjoyed that time and role — but both companies failed. Since then, I have the occasional freelance work and earn a ridiculously little amount of money. I find it depressing that I tried different types of work (corp., start-ups and freelancing), and none seem to be able to provide a sane environment combined with appropriate income.
Now I wonder whether I have chosen the right industry. As an HSP, can one be a good fit for the tech world? If yes, what would be a fitting environment or role?
[0]: https://highlysensitiverefuge.com/
[1]: https://hsperson.com/