I don't know if I really know how to deal with failure but I am slowly learning to prioritize other thing like my kids above business success. It is very conflicting process, I mean if I am giving up on my dreams, then how can I tell them to chase their dreams. What is more important, to spend time with them or to be role model?
One book that really helped me is "Shoe Dog." It is story Phil Knight and how he created Nike. Unlike some other biographies, Phil Knight described really how stressful it is to run a business. But related to parenting, it seems like he was not very close to his kids. And then unfortunate death of his elder son. Those things make me want to spend more time with my kids.
However, I still have this feeling that I am a failure, haven't really done anything worthwhile with my life.
At one point, I decided to get professional help but the cost was too much. Then I have tried using CBT to help myself establish realistic business and career goals but it doesn't work that well. It has helped me realize that I do have conflicting narcissistic grand goals. My financial goals had been:
1. Be the richest person on the earth ever\
2. Okay maybe just make one billion dollars\
3. Fine let's do just $10,000,000 - My current goal\
But then I have conflicting but a bit more realistic goals like:
1. Build passive-income business\
2. Build socially good startup\
3. Be a writer that brings social change\
4. Build a mental health non-profit\
5. Build outdoors and fitness business but I spend time outside not like CrossFit or 5k races founders who sit inside the offices\
6. Don't want to deal with office politics, so no chance I will make C-level salary\
7. Never work for more than 40 hours for someone else's business\
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I have started journaling, doesn't help when typing but I find it very useful when using pen and paper or iPad and Apple Pencil.
I think I really want to be a good father, but I don't know how to be one. Someone once posted here that the best way to show kids that it is okay to pursue their dreams is by pursuing our dreams.