Some people certainly can simply enjoy spending time with people not of their assumed cluster of traits. But that's not what's going on with trans women. They aren't doing some sort of "going overboard when you'd be perfectly happy with less" or whatever you're asking. Is it really so hard to believe trans women? Brains do _all sorts_ of things that seem weird if your own brain doesn't do it. Aphantasia, synesthesia, plurality, autism all come to mind immediately.