9214 · HackerTrans

قبل 4 سنواتdiscuss

Thanks for giving me a perspective as a younger generation! I wasn't even born at the time, and obviously see our daily reality differently. OTOH, I think what you just described falls into p. 1 and 4.

9214

قبل 4 سنواتdiscuss

Thank you for the offer, but, in all honesty, you should rather donate your money to Ukrainian support organizations. I'm already privileged enough to work remotely from home and earn a decent salary.

9214

قبل 4 سنواتdiscuss

The common narrative I see on tech forums since 24th Feb is this: "if various sanctions and blockings will make average Russians' life miserable enough (i.e. even more miserable than it already is), they will stand up and oppose the power they have been electing since 20-or-so years."

There are a few issues here:

1. Anyone who goes against the ruling power and stands up as a leader of opposition gets forcefully silenced and thrown into jail: the most popular example is Alexey Navalny. Simply put, there's not enough organizational force (i.e. absence of charismatic leader) to bring masses together.

2. The majority of Russians are in their 40-ies, have families, have government jobs, and won't risk losing the only source of income they have by opposing said government. One can call it cowardice, but to me, this is a basic survival instinct of a person who never knew a better world, who is facing a total collapse of daily systems he took for granted, and who stoically enjoys a ride into prolonged stagflation: e.g. right now bank rate is up to an all-time high of 20%, electronic prices rose by 30%, some industrial companies and small/mid-sized businesses are tanking [1] — and all of that after suffering thru the pandemic with the rest of the world.

3. There are no democratic elections in Russia (we call it "дерьмократия" in our patois, which roughly means "shit-o-cracy"). Our president's regime basically self-sustains itself, thanks to a deeply rooted corruption in upper circles and fake votes. A similar situation was in Montenegro from 1990 up until 2020, when the ruling party was overthrown because they couldn't buy enough support from abroad due to pandemic restrictions — and even that pales in comparison to what we have here.

4. The question is up in the air: even if all "goes well", who will come after Putin, and will they be able to fix this mess — not just in Russia, but in the countries their predecessor damaged? I don't know of any strong candidate capable of dragging us back from what is essentially imposed 90-ies and zeitgeist of post- Soviet Union collapse. It's like an existential fog of war all over the Earth.

—//—

[1]: As a case in point: England denied shipment of certain electronic components to Russia; a city-forming enterprise in my small hometown is a factory that produces fire-resistant materials and relies on these components. These materials are made from basalt, a certain type of volcanic rock abundant here in the Ural region — and this stuff (esp. when mixed up with other minerals) can be quite toxic, causing breathing problems and allergic reactions (I as a teenager had a part-time job on the factory, and had ulcers open up on my skin that contacted basalt dust particles). Basically, if something breaks there right now, no one will be able to fix it; and not only people will lose their jobs, but this may end up in a local ecological catastrophe.

By the same token, the neighboring town is Sverdlovsk-45: a closed city housing a plant producing uranium-238. Imagine if something goes boom there because of the disrupted infrastructure/supply chain. I understand that this sounds quite exaggerated — yet I cannot but keep "entertaining" myself with such thoughts since last week, all while being ashamed of myself for simply being born in this place.

9214

قبل 4 سنواتdiscuss

Thanks you, but I'm way past this — mostly because I reevaluated my stance towards academia and have a family to support here.

To clarify: I contacted one of the professors directly, whom I visited, who was aware of my background (my employee at the time introduced us and wrote an informal letter of recommendation), and who collaborated on a startup project I mentioned.

9214

قبل 4 سنواتdiscuss

This is an interesting and valid point. Though, even if I could, why would I? Forming a bond (be it faked or real) with a person who might end up despising you for your blood (which you are trying to escape), and then trying to integrate into a hostile foreign culture — it's like trading one hellhole for another.

It might be worth the struggle in case of a sincere relationship, but not just for the sake of saving my sorry ass.

9214

قبل 4 سنواتdiscuss

In 2022: zero, unless you have relatives/friends from abroad who are willing to help. I'm mid-20s below-average Russian born and raised in a city with population of 19k (and declining), Ural region. Average salary here is around 200-300 USD, 400 if you are lucky.

I emmigrated in 2019 to work with an international startup in Montenegro: and ended up being ostracized and harassed by my manager from another country (won't point fingers to avoid unnecesary nationalism) on a cultural/ethnical basis; was forced to leave after a year and a half.

After that, in 2021, I was offered to come to US by a fellow colleague with Ukranian roots: worker visas were denied to Russian citizens at that point, and most of the embassies were either closed or worked in a limited capacity (also due to pandemic).

My last attempt (again in 2021) was to apply for PhD in EPHE institute of France (I have an MS degree in a programme related to medical tech, computer vision, and brain-computer interfaces): I got nothing in response.

Since then I have been holed up in my hometown. Another friend of mine proposed some time ago to come to Vietnam: but with the entire world openly opposed to my nation, I doubt that will ever happen.

9214

قبل 5 سنواتdiscuss

Pain has a transformative character, and the one you have will never go away. Your duty is to live with it, the same way your loved one did.

My grandmother was an avid gardener. Now that summer is here, I tend to it every day after job. It's in a state of desolation, with wild grass growing everywhere and empty garden beds. I weed them out and take care of the seedlings: sweating, with my muscles arching from physical work, hands being numb because of nettle burns, knees bleeding after crawling on gravel around dooryard.

I struggle and take pleasure in the labor that causes me pain, the way my grandmother did — so that she can live on in her hobby, in that pain, that very act of gardening. She *is* her garden, and *my* grandmother, after all.

  Mother to Christ, at a loss:
  - Are you my God or son?
  You’re nailed onto the cross.
  Tell me how to go on?
  How can I go, having not
  understood, grasped, derived:
  are you my son or God?
  That is, dead or alive?

  He, in turn, explained:
  - Dead or alive, this time,
  woman, it’s all the same.
  Son or God, I’m thine.

  — Joseph Brodsky, Nature Morte

The *time*-travel you are looking for isn't about being there and then. It's about persisting the pastime (the way of engaging with the materiality of *space*) of those who are long gone. About deciding what you steal from Kronos, what you leave to be devoured by him, and how far will you manage to travel with that stolen good now claimed as yours.

So, my advice: look into your father-in-law's stories and military career; write and perform acts of bravery the way he did.

https://youtu.be/O7fXfCZ4sB4?t=95

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