This is an excellent comment. Thanks for sharing your perspective in such great detail.
>Their existence is defined by mental turmoil and acute pessimism.
I’ve been trying to find the words for this - I (cis male and married) don’t feel this way but many of my peers do. It is disheartening; a very real black hole of anguish.
It’s transphobic in the “hydrophobic” sense. I don’t think he merely pushes back on activists; I find he delegitimizes the movement altogether.
Which, disclaimer, I do think anyone should be free to do. But people who are offended must be free to share their thoughts as well, then.
It’s akin to saying alcohol addiction isn’t a real addiction. It’s not that you’re making fun of alcoholics, the idea of an alcohol addict, or the behavior and recovery of an alcohol addict — You’re instead devaluing the idea that someone can be addicted to alcohol, falsifying their reality.
Sure, many people can laugh at that, but it’s only going to be the people who can’t relate. The people who have never been familiar with or been victim to substance abuse can probably laugh at the idea that you can just “stop drinking right now, there, problem solved, now what was so hard about that?” because the idea is so foreign to them.
Humor will always be divisive, which means as a comedian you alone wield the responsibility for where that line will be drawn. Chapelle intentionally draws it on personal identity.
I think we can support better comedy than that. Anyone can make an in-crowd; A great comedian makes you the subject and makes you laugh about it too.
In my lifetime, “parentheses” has been the canonical way to refer to () in the US. “Brackets” is an umbrella term that can describe one or all of (), {}, and [].
If you’re in a context where only one of the bracket types would normally be used, you can just call them “brackets.” Since many people never really use [] and {}, “brackets” casually refers to ().
To disambiguate, you can call () “open brackets”, [] “square brackets”, and {} “curly brackets.”
And for the cherry on top, {} can be called “curly braces.” That’s my preferred term for them. But it’s awkward to call [] “square braces” and () “open braces” :)
You're living in the shadow of someone else's expectations!
Of course you're going to feel this way -- You don't deserve that, and emotions are going to ensue. That is the human in us, and that is the human in you.
> Can’t make myself do anything anymore
Your motivation is tapped out from carrying these weights you never asked for. It's not your fault you feel this way.
> Im not achieving anything, no matter how hard i try
And you never will in the land of unreasonable expectations. Your work ethic isn't the issue, it's the impossible bar set before you.
> On my 6th month of doing barely anything and it’s already December
You're burnt out. It's okay to sit with that feeling for awhile. It takes time to realize it.
> I’m regretting that i didn’t use the time to achieve something meaningful
Regret comes from a decision. This wasn't a decision, you simply were not able to use the time as you imagined.
Mental health can be just as serious of an obstacle as broken bones. When your legs are sprained, you can't regret the run you couldn't take. When your brain is clouded by emotion, you can't regret the work you couldn't make.
> I have money, but i’m miserable and unhappy
There is an expectation placed upon you that money should make you happy.
It sure does not! And you are the living proof. There's nothing wrong with you. The expectation is wrong.
Shelter, security, and fulfillment make us happy. Money cannot help you acquire all these things.
> I feel ashamed of being that guy who is always depressed, angry and sad
You deserve to exist as you are. There is no shame in feeling this sadness and this anger. Emotions are part of the human experience. They do not ruin our value.
It's also natural for some people to have trouble with emotional company. Frequently people are taught to suppress emotions and that is projected onto others, perhaps this is happening to you.
I'm happy you're here today. I feel no shame or disappointment for you.
> All i dream of to make a contribution and somehow make an impact
You are on a quest for glory! If this quest is your own, and not from an expectation set before you, you will find your way.
You must take care of these feelings first however. It's all part of the quest or, if you prefer to see it this way, a prerequisite. You cannot conquer your dreams with this fog.
> Yet i struggle to find anyone who needs my help
I know one person who needs your help. It is the person who said this:
> I’m trying all my best to be a good person, yet i’m still not good enough for myself
You have to put on your own oxygen mask before you help others. Your wellbeing matters!
> I’m thinking my (dead) grandparents would be embarrassed of me being such a looser
To be embarrassed of you means they had expectations of you. This is the shadow.
You are not a loser. This life is yours. You may do as you please with it.
The FDIC-insured nonsense alone perplexes me. There is no web to spin here that favors them.
Did they really think they could get away with this? Or did they have a severe cascade of miscommunication? It is incredibly irresponsible and careless behavior either way.
The drama is pretty ridiculous sometimes, it’s true :)
This aspect isn’t unique to Depop however. Other buying and selling platforms that allow negotiation are full of people trying to assert their nonsense onto you.
It feels like it’s just part of organic haggling culture. And for some people, like my partner, I think wading through the nonsense and having a handle on it can be part of the fun.
Likewise though, I’m interested in seeing how the acquihire goes.
Anecdotally, this platform gives liquidity to your otherwise unsellable clothes, and that is the big appeal.
If you have a dress you’ll no longer wear, you have a few online platforms to sell it on, but they’re not known for fashionable clothing. Nobody will be looking for your clothes on there organically. It drives the price of your clothes down, if you’re even able to sell them at all.
A lot of people use this to recycle interesting fashion and keep their closets and outfits interesting at a really low cost, as my partner does.
You do have flippers of course, it’s common enough that they call Depop-flipped items “repops”. I suspect this can be profitable, but you need to source your items at a great discount.
My partner is a top seller on Depop. We send and receive packages pretty much every day, it’s been great for them during the pandemic.
Depop has done a great job fostering a more human experience than other platforms. That’s definitely a huge factor in their success.
Buying and selling is pretty involved. Haggling is super common. If you’re selling many items, people will message you and ask for bundle deals. If you’re a regular, sometimes people will just throw you a discount. If you just buy something silently, you’ll often get a short thank-you message.
There’s a culture around the packaging, too. People tend to put candies, stickers, hand-written thank-you notes, extra things the seller doesn’t need anymore. It’s fun to open packages coming in, and it’s fun to pack them out with little surprises.
My partner has made a lot of friends that way, which has led to trading of talents and services. Sometimes it’s just people helping people, sometimes it’s commissions, sometimes it’s bartering, but all originating from the platform.
Acknowledging the damage inflicted by an abusive past partner.
I'm able to say "this is something that happened to me" and address it as such -- It isn't a thing I push to the back of my brain to deal with later, or an isolating trauma I'm afraid of losing friends over, or an overshadowing fixation I'm worried has changed me.
It's in the front row now, being processed piece by piece.
Over the past year I've been initiating more conversations with friends, opening up more, and taking much better care of myself. I feel better; I feel happier, and the trajectory is set for that to continue.
It is far more unpredictable to litigate based on intent and public perception.
If an app displays a phone number but doesn’t say it belongs to the restaurant, is that making the current partnership clear or unclear? It’s a question left to precedent, which means there is a chance the legislation would not have teeth.
Instead of throwing restaurant owners into that mess, the new law we have today forbids a specific set of provable behaviors.
>Their existence is defined by mental turmoil and acute pessimism.
I’ve been trying to find the words for this - I (cis male and married) don’t feel this way but many of my peers do. It is disheartening; a very real black hole of anguish.