I fell in love with an assassin (2008)(independent.co.uk)
independent.co.uk
I fell in love with an assassin (2008)
http://www.independent.co.uk/news/world/americas/i-fell-in-love-with-a-female-assassin-791978.html
82 comments
I followed this advice. Highly recommend it.
Everyone is of course titled to their own opinion but for me personally I feel like Love doesn't mean what this person thinks it means.....
He was young too. Perhaps it was love, for him, as he understood it at that time.
How do you define love? Isn't the whole idea that it's beyond reason and moral?
People need to experience true risk and true loss before they develop true feeling. Before that it's all flat and simple. Of course it's hard to say if you would like someone to experience such a bad thing to gain that inside or rather want them to experience such a flat life. In my eyes not an easy choice what to wish for others.
Fascinating story.
Colombia still has a ways to go, but luckily things have improved a lot in the last 10 to 15 years. It's my favourite country I've ever travelled in and I was met with nothing but hospitality and generosity.
Colombia still has a ways to go, but luckily things have improved a lot in the last 10 to 15 years. It's my favourite country I've ever travelled in and I was met with nothing but hospitality and generosity.
> leading a secret double life – as an assassin
These things always make me chuckle
These things always make me chuckle
The ndash or the format?
Like: meet [name], actress and model.
I don't think it's quite the same.
She could have been living a double life and not been an assassin. They aren't synonymous. People live double lives where they have multiple families, or other things. A double life isn't only reserved for assasins, so the clarification is actually quite important.
The author was explaining that he just found out that his girlfriend was living an alternative life in addition to the one he knew. Then he clarifies, what the "double life" was, it was as an assassin.
She could have been living a double life and not been an assassin. They aren't synonymous. People live double lives where they have multiple families, or other things. A double life isn't only reserved for assasins, so the clarification is actually quite important.
The author was explaining that he just found out that his girlfriend was living an alternative life in addition to the one he knew. Then he clarifies, what the "double life" was, it was as an assassin.
What if the assassin discovers you lead a double life - and assassinates one of your lives - so you have one life? Then double lives would be only for assassins.
I always cringe a little when I read these naive white-boy style of stories, in form of documentaries or texts like this one. Reminds me so much of how I acted the first time I was in a country where people are still required to face reality much closer than they like. Reminds me of how I probably still act considering how good a life we live here in the West.
It's really a pity when these documentaries don't contain literal quotes and face expression images, since there is so much that a naive documenter can't see, and therefore can't write down. For instance in these situations for the man it's usually an exciting adventure with sexy cherries on top. But for her it's often an attempt for a better life, a very serious matter. But because she knows that the John Snows don't know anything, she also needs to play the relaxed sexy lover.
This, I believe is true strength. Constantly for weeks, maybe months, acting relaxed and enjoying having another person inside you, not because it's the truth but because you hope for your daughter, your blood, that she will have a better life than you. It's an amazing thing to watch. And really painful when she dies in the end like in this story, to some degree because the guy wasn't able to even get a hint of the situation.
For other people who also enjoy that I suggest the movie "The Banquet (2006)" (夜宴) from China. It gives a good opportunity to get an inside view into that kind of situation. Quote (own translation): "The true art is not to hide your feelings behind a mask. The true art is to turn your face into the mask."
It's really a pity when these documentaries don't contain literal quotes and face expression images, since there is so much that a naive documenter can't see, and therefore can't write down. For instance in these situations for the man it's usually an exciting adventure with sexy cherries on top. But for her it's often an attempt for a better life, a very serious matter. But because she knows that the John Snows don't know anything, she also needs to play the relaxed sexy lover.
This, I believe is true strength. Constantly for weeks, maybe months, acting relaxed and enjoying having another person inside you, not because it's the truth but because you hope for your daughter, your blood, that she will have a better life than you. It's an amazing thing to watch. And really painful when she dies in the end like in this story, to some degree because the guy wasn't able to even get a hint of the situation.
For other people who also enjoy that I suggest the movie "The Banquet (2006)" (夜宴) from China. It gives a good opportunity to get an inside view into that kind of situation. Quote (own translation): "The true art is not to hide your feelings behind a mask. The true art is to turn your face into the mask."
>> But her excuses, or lack of them, riled me and I told her she represented everything that was wrong with the country.
Bold thing to say to a sociopath with a gun.
Bold thing to say to a sociopath with a gun.
Thinking only sociopaths can do really terrible things is likely very wrong. Normal people can decide over some time to switch off empathy, or to work against it. This needs to be understood.
Anger, pain or desperation will make otherwise normal people do some very abnormal things.
Even in the most "civilized" and wealthy of western democracies, 1 week of no food, water and electricity would lead to absolute bedlam.
Three months of that kind of desperation would lead to otherwise normal people killing and robbing strangers. When the crisis abates, they'll be able to rationalize away their behavior because it was necessary.
Even in the most "civilized" and wealthy of western democracies, 1 week of no food, water and electricity would lead to absolute bedlam.
Three months of that kind of desperation would lead to otherwise normal people killing and robbing strangers. When the crisis abates, they'll be able to rationalize away their behavior because it was necessary.
The most dangerous person in the world is someone with nothing to lose. If you have nothing left to lose then you aren't constrained by worrying about tomorrow.
"An empty stomach has no conscience".
I would argue that neither does a stiff dick.
If you look at Maslov's hierarchy, if you can't fulfill your basic needs at the bottom of the pyramid, you're not really looking for self-actualization.
I would argue that neither does a stiff dick.
If you look at Maslov's hierarchy, if you can't fulfill your basic needs at the bottom of the pyramid, you're not really looking for self-actualization.
> Normal people can decide over some time to switch off empathy, or to work against it.
Yes, and all it typically takes to turn off empathy is believing they're doing the right thing against "bad" people.
Yes, and all it typically takes to turn off empathy is believing they're doing the right thing against "bad" people.
I don't think there is any evidence to show that sociopathy is only an innate attribute and that it is not learnable. The only definition of sociopathy I can find is based on behavior. So if you act like a sociopath, it doesn't really matter how many nightmares you had on the way to getting there, you're a sociopath.
She was just a mass murderer. I don't see any indications of sociopathy.
I bet most people could be turned to this life given her circumstances and environment.
I bet most people could be turned to this life given her circumstances and environment.
The two biggest mistakes people tend to repeat are thinking that (1) it can't happen here and (2) if it does happen here I'll be different.
It's our society that is better, not our people.
It'll never go to zero, but in a well-off society you see mental health issues accounting for a lot of crime. In poor or chaotic societies, there is the added element of otherwise normal people forced by circumstance into doing terrible things.
Societies are not on some kind of monotonically increasing slope, they can regress and they can do so with astonishing speed.
Society cannot erase the demons of our nature. At best you achieve a level of control that is fleeting.
She accepted payment from a friend to murder the friend's boyfriend's other girlfriend. Not only that, she decapitated and dismembered the body. Did we read the same article? Having a "just doing a job" attitude about killing other people is sociopathic.
If what she said about killing the first person was correct, she felt remorse. She had a conscious, she just forced herself to ignore it until killing stopped bothering her.
Historical genocides, and massacres show that either there are a lot more latent sociopaths out there than we ever dreamed of, or normal people can become desensitized to killing.
Historical genocides, and massacres show that either there are a lot more latent sociopaths out there than we ever dreamed of, or normal people can become desensitized to killing.
You don't have to be a sociopath to do horrific things. A lot of people are capable of doing the same in the right (wrong) circumstances.
A lot of people don't like to hear that. It's simmilar to when people call Hitler, Pol Pot, Idi Amin, etc. "monsters", they weren't monsters, they were human. Humans are capable of some pretty fucked up things
I think this is the kind of stupidity that women actually filter for, not filter against. Because that kind of stupidity can only come with a save and comparatively rich life.
"With their story set to become a major Hollywood film..."
Has anybody heared of that major Hollywood film?
Has anybody heared of that major Hollywood film?
Usually film plots linger for decades (even major stuff) and often die altogether.
There's this, which might be tangentially inspired (2 years after the article): https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Colombiana
There's also a documentary about the guy in the article (who's a photojournalist himself): http://www.imdb.com/title/tt3766432/
There's this, which might be tangentially inspired (2 years after the article): https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Colombiana
There's also a documentary about the guy in the article (who's a photojournalist himself): http://www.imdb.com/title/tt3766432/
As a Colombian who remembers how things were nine years ago (I was sixteen and just starting college)[1], I have to admit that the thing I found most shocking was that he wasn't just kidnapped by the rebels. That non-sequitur of mine aside, good story.
[1]: Although that's for the publication of the article; the events described happened before then. But that's even more understandable as the closer one gets to the nineties (and the actual nineties), the worse the painting of Colombia is.
[1]: Although that's for the publication of the article; the events described happened before then. But that's even more understandable as the closer one gets to the nineties (and the actual nineties), the worse the painting of Colombia is.
"But what happens if your new girlfriend has a much darker and more sinister secret than having slept around a bit?"
And what, exactly, is wrong with "having slept around a bit?"
And what, exactly, is wrong with "having slept around a bit?"
Higher risk of STDs, higher risk of cheating.
There's nothing morally wrong with sleeping around if that's your deal, doesn't mean I have to want to date people who sleep around.
(I happen not to mind because i) I have a high sex drive, people who've slept around usually do too so we're a good match, and ii) I'm not very jealous, I'd consider an open relationship with the right person. But there are legitimate reasons to worry about it.)
There's nothing morally wrong with sleeping around if that's your deal, doesn't mean I have to want to date people who sleep around.
(I happen not to mind because i) I have a high sex drive, people who've slept around usually do too so we're a good match, and ii) I'm not very jealous, I'd consider an open relationship with the right person. But there are legitimate reasons to worry about it.)
I think his comment is just contrasting the actual secret with more trivial things people worry about. If they should or should not worry about that last bit really isn't what he is getting at.
Nothing wrong with it per se.
Personally, I use # of sexual partners as a signal for how successful the relationship will be. It's an indicator of how stable the person is in their romantic relationships.
Of course there are counterexamples, i.e. a virgin who ends up a terrible partner and a promiscuous person who ends up being the love of my life.
Personally, I use # of sexual partners as a signal for how successful the relationship will be. It's an indicator of how stable the person is in their romantic relationships.
Of course there are counterexamples, i.e. a virgin who ends up a terrible partner and a promiscuous person who ends up being the love of my life.
Much higher chance of STDs. I was recently reading something like 1 in 5 Americans has at least one. No thanks.
Have you heard the term "sexually transmitted desease"?
wumbolad(2)
One time, I fell in love with a run of the mill sociopath. Fortunately, she wasn't a violent one.
He definitely had some issues as well. For sex he let assassinating informants and others (non-militant?) slide. It seemed like he still tried to keep the sexual relationship going even after she told him she did some side work cutting a body into pieces, though it was harder and eventually led to him moving on. All around no bueno.
Nobody is the villain of their own story.
THIS!
I'm sure that she's the victim in her own story.
I'm sure that she's the victim in her own story.
I suspect living in a war zone does this to people, which is how he explained it. Somehow he was able to see his girlfriend as a soldier instead of a murderer when the two were conflated.
Rationality is not what humans are best in. People stay in toxic relationships, or make babies in the middle of a war.
We are driven by chemistry much more than rationality.
We are driven by chemistry much more than rationality.
This must be what it would be like to be a Bond girl in real life. Not very glamorous. As a dude, I've never really thought of what it's like to date someone who kills people for a living because the gender roles are usually reversed.
[deleted]
this is such a dull article. how did it get upvoted?
[deleted]
BTW, this is the ninth time I have submitted this story. But I just knew it fits this audience, so I tried again.
So, if you feel your submissions never make it to the front page, realize that much of it is pure chance.
So, if you feel your submissions never make it to the front page, realize that much of it is pure chance.
Yeah, @dang this is what I've been saying.
How do you resubmit the same link though? You tack on &attempt=55 to the end?
How do you resubmit the same link though? You tack on &attempt=55 to the end?
One trick is to append a period after the TLD.
So for the link above, it'd be
http://www.independent.co.uk./news/world/americas/i-fell-in-...
Notice the period after ".co.uk" and before the "/"
E.g. "Example.com./"
Having a period after TLD is a valid URL. But rarely seen.
So for the link above, it'd be
http://www.independent.co.uk./news/world/americas/i-fell-in-...
Notice the period after ".co.uk" and before the "/"
E.g. "Example.com./"
Having a period after TLD is a valid URL. But rarely seen.
This is part of DNS.
Having a period after the domain tells DNS not to search any search domains setup on the system. If your system was setup with the search domain example.com, www.independent.co.uk could also be evaluated as www.independent.co.uk.example.com (if it had a DNS entry) by your system whereas www.independent.co.uk. can't.
Having a period after the domain tells DNS not to search any search domains setup on the system. If your system was setup with the search domain example.com, www.independent.co.uk could also be evaluated as www.independent.co.uk.example.com (if it had a DNS entry) by your system whereas www.independent.co.uk. can't.
Interesting -- sounds like you found a bug in the URL checker.
You just wait a bit.
This story actually was on the front page, which is also why I don't give your link an upvote. But maybe not by you. Btw retransmitting is frowned upon in most communities and can even result in bans.
Resubmitting is specifically declared welcome here. The mods not only send out invitations to resubmit, they even implemented auto-resubmit.
Maybe read at least the FAQ and the guidelines before trying to police others?
Maybe read at least the FAQ and the guidelines before trying to police others?
Well, I remember submissions not getting through with the error message that the link was already posted by someone else before.
He's certainly a better photographer than writer, as I found that an overworked chore to read.
The humans who are both excellent writers AND have the guts to pursue a story like this in such a dangerous area are probably extremely rare
Maybe The Independent could have found a human to work on his copy with him?
2edgy4me
Nice throwaway, pal.
* 7 points by greekyogurt21 3 days ago | parent [-] | on: Tesla factory workers pushing for a union send dem...
Made an account just to say that I couldn't tell if this post was sarcasm or not. Really? You don't want "...tyranny of the masses demanding ever more pay, benefits, etc until a company is bled dry", but you're ok with "..government enforced guarantees of decent treatment."?
Strong fucking everything
Made an account just to say that I couldn't tell if this post was sarcasm or not. Really? You don't want "...tyranny of the masses demanding ever more pay, benefits, etc until a company is bled dry", but you're ok with "..government enforced guarantees of decent treatment."?
Strong fucking everything
Honestly don't understand why this is downvoted. It's not just an opinion but the article is objectively really not that high quality. It's just that the content is exciting for some people.
Sad.
The first sentence seems something out of Buzzfeed.
> ... (with a few conveniently erased).
Just... why?
> ... (with a few conveniently erased).
Just... why?
Oh great. Yet another person who throws Buzzfeed under the bus without actually reading their articles.
Have you ever even read their news articles? They are of a much higher standard than anything The Independent has ever put out.
Have you ever even read their news articles? They are of a much higher standard than anything The Independent has ever put out.
I am pretty sure he was referring to Buzzfeed's clickbait titles. They are pretty famous for it so it's a fair comparison.
Also, this gem:
> We ate on the balcony and, as we shared a bottle of wine and listened to the chorus of insects, I began to think that the year of groundwork I had put in was about to pay off. Marylin stayed the night.
> We ate on the balcony and, as we shared a bottle of wine and listened to the chorus of insects, I began to think that the year of groundwork I had put in was about to pay off. Marylin stayed the night.
At least he is kind-of-honest about his motives.
My take:
The author maybe thinks she might feel shame about some of her past sexual partners; maybe he feels shame about some of his and believes given enough time everyone has shame about a sexual partner or two, for whatever reason.
The other option is the author thinks that she believes the author will see her in a negative light for some of her past sexual partners, for whatever reason, so she will not mention the ones that show her in a bad light.
The author maybe thinks she might feel shame about some of her past sexual partners; maybe he feels shame about some of his and believes given enough time everyone has shame about a sexual partner or two, for whatever reason.
The other option is the author thinks that she believes the author will see her in a negative light for some of her past sexual partners, for whatever reason, so she will not mention the ones that show her in a bad light.
I'd advise not flipping through the photos until you read it, though. Spoiler alert. Some of those should have been left for the end.