This is exactly what AG Grid Server Side Row Model is designed for. I would recommend anyone considering putting a grid on a large dataset to at least understand what AG Grid has to offer here. The trick is only load what the user needs to see, AG Grid achieves this with Grouping and lazy loading children as the user expands, and also infinite scrolling to present more rows as the user scrolls down.
Have you looked at the AG Grid release from two weeks ago? We released a new theme called Quartz, which I understand is much better. Eg it has automatic switching between dark and bright mode based on users desktop preferance.
Niall here from ag-Grid - thanks for the nice words about ag-Grid. Yes we support Angular 1, Angular 2+, React, Aurelia, Vue, Web Components, and just plain JavaScript.